Once I got home from practice, I ran straight towards my room. There was a big biology exam that I completely forgot to study for, so I stayed in my room for hours to do so. I counted the minutes as I flipped through cell diagrams, regretting not reviewing this earlier. When I left my room mid-study, I noticed my family lying on the couch watching a movie together. They invited me over to sit with them, but I had to say no — my grades depended on it.
After hours of studying, I eagerly walked into an empty living room. It was late and they were already asleep. I guiltily walked back to my room, wishing I had said yes when they asked me to hangout. As I lay in bed, I pondered how much of my time is spent in my room, trapped, studying, without seeing my family. This was completely disrupting my relationship with them.
It reminded me of a sunny afternoon during my freshman year when I was writing a poem for my literature class about what I thought music was. I remember running to my mom for approval, asking her what she thought of it. A smile marked her face; she told me it was a beautiful poem and how much she loved my hard work. Hearing those words encouraged me and made me feel even more proud of what I would do in school. As my workload increased, those times slowly went away, and I got used to not asking for help anymore. I would deal with my homework alone and without eating for hours. I was handling things well, at least I thought. Plus, I did not want to bother my mom with extra work.
Things started to change when my mom decided to go back to college a few months ago. She asked me to work next to her in the dining room. Suddenly, we were sharing more time together, having our favorite snacks and taking breaks for a quick stretch. I felt happier and heard when I was with her, and glad that she could help me with homework and give me tips on what I should do next. Even though I still had a lot of work, doing it in a different environment with someone I love made me feel less stressed and more at ease.
After switching from my desk in my bedroom to the table in the dining room, where I was not alone anymore, I started noticing how much time it was taking me to complete an assignment. I noticed my distractions and the amount of time I would lose by zoning out or replying to text messages. I was not being efficient. So other than listening to my mom’s perspectives on my homework, I made a schedule that guided me through what I had to get done per hour and left my phone charging in the kitchen.
I gained awareness of how much time I was spending alone and online. Having a planned schedule helped me get my homework done at a reasonable time and spend less time isolated in my bedroom and more time with my family. This new routine brought so many positive impacts, including being able to talk to my mom about my day and how everything went, and what I was struggling with. I was in a happier mood every day, and although I was tired, I was joyful when I got ready for school each morning.
School was always something I struggled with, and I am glad that I’ve learned how to manage my time and attention better. Now, I get to spend more time with my family and I’m still able to complete all my work. Spending more time with my family has also noticeably improved my mental health; I have more support and people to turn to whenever I’m struggling with something and I no longer have to face challenges alone since I know I have my mom by my side guiding me through what to do. I believe that as students, it’s important to reflect on how we spend our time. When we focus too much on a single activity, like schoolwork and sports, we risk losing balance in our lives, which can quickly lead to feeling overwhelmed and disconnected from the people we care about. If we acknowledge this, it enables us to make positive changes that support our mental and emotional well-being. Maybe family time can work!
