How do I become a go-getter?
It’s a question I pondered frequently as I tried to cram four years of high school into a handful of college essays, wishing I’d taken more risks and sought out more career-specific summer programs and research positions. Too often, I started my hunt for summer opportunities too late and ended up submitting a poorly-written application the day it was due or, worse, missing the application deadline entirely. Even now, the question hasn’t escaped me. As I prepare to be just one face in a sea of over 30,000 undergraduate students, I’ve come across users on Reddit forums and parents on incoming freshman group chats preaching the importance of being a go-getter.
The way my parents have defined it to me, a go-getter is a person who is proactive about seeking out opportunities like internships and research, especially by networking — that is, forming connections with many people around oneself, a daunting task for an introvert like myself.
I am a firm believer that people, including myself, can transform themselves for the better, but that doesn’t stop me from worrying. Although maybe a bit overdramatic, part of me fears that not taking initiative won’t just stop me from finding new opportunities, mentors and friends — I fear I won’t be proactive about reaching out to my loved ones frequently enough, and thus will not be able to maintain long-distance relationships with them.
Granted, my friend group isn’t as split up as it could be — my farthest friend will be in Boulder, Colo. — and I’m barely 50 miles, or a two-hour drive on a bad day, away from home. But still, being separated from the friends and family and familiarity of the past few years, and subsequently being forced to learn how to stay anchored with my loved ones in a sea of new faces and more academic pressure than ever before, is intimidating. However, I’ve found some comfort in realizing that the very same people I am scared of growing distant from have equipped me with exactly what I need in order to stay connected with them as I get busier and farther away.
While learning to drive, my evenings have recently been spent on long drives with a parent to nowhere in particular. I raise my seat all the way up, click my seatbelt into place and start a steady stream of gossip between me and whichever parent is sitting shotgun, interrupted only by their instructions to “slow down” or “switch lanes.” Over time, I’ve learned to balance being observant about the road around me while staying somewhat focused on my conversations with them. Surely, if I can do that, I can simultaneously stay vigilant about hunting for research and internship opportunities while still making time to connect with my loved ones.
As I attempt to network with others around me, my memories with my cross-country team will serve as a reminder that connection with others can arise at unexpected moments — an unforgettable memory I have with the team is from an impromptu animal rescue in which we wrangled six bunnies we found abandoned on a trail. Between calling a ranger and working to capture all the bunnies, who, admittedly, easily outran us, the experience was a hectic few hours, but a powerful team bonding experience. As I seek out new friends and mentors, this experience serves as a reminder that sometimes, friendship can be forged in unlikely moments — I just have to keep an open mind.
At the end of the day, the demands of college will be intimidating, but I’m far more prepared to seek out connections with friends and mentors than I think. To college, I will carry experiences with and values of the people I’ve surrounded myself with over the past few years — like my coach’s pre-practice lessons about how to practice gratitude and my piano teacher’s reminders about how many small changes can transform a piece — that will help me not only stay connected with them, but also to seek out new experiences and connections that will help me become a go-getter.
