Comment. Scroll. Edit. Post. Like. These actions constitute our daily habits. Go out to a dinner with a couple friends and it wouldn’t be surprising to see people constantly checking social media. Anyone can post on Facebook in a matter of seconds and countless people can have access to that post. Anyone can make a video that pushes for social change, and there is no telling how many people will see it.

Yet, insecurity and decreased authentic relationships are brewing in the midst of social media use.

Modern culture has transformed the real intentions of social media, the spread of information and communication, into an outlet for the showing of personal belongings, achievements and conformed behavior.

Jorge Peña, Ph.D, assistant professor in the department of Communication of University of California, Davis, stated that “[People] want to appear, want to self-represent, want to show themselves in a particular light or [share] a particular side of themselves for an audience…[we’re] disguising ourselves as a certain type of person.”

The motives to share are rooted in the longing for a better, more perfect portrayal of oneself on social media. Or perhaps just the desire to be heard and feel wanted. Social media users get consumed in a mentality of portraying the perfect self and perfect accomplishments, causing social media today to act as a sort of hindrance to genuine, face-to-face friendships.

Forbes magazine writer, J. Maureen Henderson, reports, “Almost a quarter of Americans say that they’ve missed out on important life moments in their quest to capture and memorialize them for social media.”

Social media, once a tool for connectivity, has become the stage for a competition for likes or peer approval.

Sure we can post pictures of our lives, we can edit photos, and we can post statuses of our opinions. And we should. But we must be wary of those actions transforming into personal propaganda, into spending countless hours in hopes of gaining approval from online friends or followers.

Investing so much time editing and choosing to post a single picture adds to the unconscious effect of getting drawn into this mentality. With this in mind, social media fosters comparison of quality of life, and takes away from genuine experiences.

Associate Professor of the Communication Department of Santa Clara University, Dr. Christine Bachen, stated that “There’s a downside [to social media], a kind of depression or envy, a sense that your own life is far less interesting than the lives of those around you…people are constantly comparing themselves with similar others.”

People naturally strive to look better and portray themselves better. Posting pictures of expensive cars, fancy houses, luxurious vacation trips, or college acceptances are outlets from which we can advertise self-worth. A contest of self-worth is seemingly played out on the world’s stage, the Internet and the unit of judgement is the number of likes on a profile picture-most of which come from people who may not even be our close friends.

Yes, it’s natural to want more likes. But when people become so dependent on others’ approval of their personas, their actions become indirectly and inconspicuously controlled by their peers. This also takes away quality time from real relationships in person. Intrinsic impulses to constantly check number of likes takes away from personal time with friends at a hangout or a family dinner.

When on social media, people feel obscured from face-to-face pressures or consequences, and want to fit in by representing a false perfection. But this invokes harm, and breeds pervasive self-consciousness among onlookers.

A recent study conducted by University of Michigan psychologists shows that the more people used social media, the more gloomy they felt. The cause? Comparison. When people are engaged in observing prosperous and propagandized versions of others’ lives, they feel worse about their own. Modern social media outlets have unintentionally amplified motives to appear better than others or represent an artificial personality, becoming places of social uneasiness and inadequacy complexes.

Conformity in non-picture posts add to the social pressures that cause individuals to put on a shield of popular opinion. Individual motives are then influenced by other’s approval. When an idea is created or a social movement is started, it usually spreads like wildfire across social media platforms. Not because the particular idea or movement is so compelling that it warrants such attention but because of mob mentality. Mob mentality can propel people to long to be someone they “should” be, and strive to be that conformed, perfect persona.

According to CNET, a technology news forum, a new study shows that around 69 percent of teenagers believe that they are rarely themselves online.

This is not to say that we should be coerced into taking responsibility for other’s actions on social media but that we should be accountable for individual motives.

It’s completely acceptable to post on social media.

But we should understand why we are posting something and whether we would say that in person. Whatever we say on social media is attached to our name, our identity. Spending time to try to look like, act like or think like someone we are not demeans the helpful intentions of social media.

Social media is a privilege but it’s something taken for granted. All the while, just like any other privilege, it should be appreciated and recognized– not used for the seeking of approval, for this breeds conformity.

Online connectivity is not something that plays a role in taking away authentic human relationships in person, and we shouldn’t let it be.

Social media is not a mask; it’s a platform.

This story was reported on by Pranav Jandhyala and Emily Zhao