If things don’t work out for you on Valentine’s Day, I’m sorry for you, but it’s in the science!
Romance may be magical and a mystery, but some of it can also be explained through objective research. In fact, there’s a new biological field examining the chemicals that influence love.
If you listen to the theory of a chemical basis for love, for example, it states that the human language was selected as a mating signal to judge reproductive fitness. A “rewards system” in the brain makes love like an addiction. And, as we all know, hormones take a big part in the world of relationships, too.
According to a recent study by the University of Texas, a new discovery was made in this field of infatuation—speech similarities in couples affects the relationship’s duration. 40 college students went on four-minute speed dates and the conversations were recorded. Three months later, 80 percent of the couples who spoke similarly were still together.
The key to this study was observing function words—words with ambiguous meanings that relate to other words used in conversation. These words can be anything from “him,” “it,” or “anyway.” People also tend to pick up speech patterns from their partners, and even writing styles from constant instant messaging or email. Couples that use similar function words are more likely to stay together than those who don’t (Ken and Barbie’s relationship is a testament to this).
If you date doesn’t work out, it may not be your fault at all. What this somewhat unfortunate article is saying is that if you and your crush don’t have the right “word chemistry,” your relationship might be doomed from the start. However, if you simplify the science, a rather obvious assumption is proven—communication is key. While function words may indicate whether people are “on the same page” or “in the same state,” they also show that you’re paying attention to the other person and aren’t zoning out. What’s the point of dating someone who you can’t understand what you’re saying and vice versa? It’s the basis of most misunderstandings.
Let’s just hope Cupid will pair you with someone on your same wavelength for the sake of this study. If not, then I’d suggest the conventional, non-scientific approach—extra chocolates and a snappier outfit!
