No, really. Why?
In my years of high school, I’ve seen my share of male genitalia in all shapes and sizes. In lockers, textbooks, notebooks, (reportedly) in boys’ bathrooms, scratched onto desks, homework, lab equipment, the list goes on. And my only question is: why?
A vast majority of the time, it seems to be the Martians who are found gleefully carving these symbols into every surface they can get their hands on. Frankly, I just don’t understand the male preoccupation with the drawn phallus. Maybe it’s an abstruse Freudian thing, or maybe it’s just immaturity.
My hypothesis? I think the average — or in this case, slightly below average — Martian has a deep-seated insecurity about measuring up to society’s expectations of him. We’re hyper aware of Venusians’ vulnerability to others’ opinions, but what we often fail to consider are the implied standards for males. A man’s self-confidence may be just as fragile as a woman’s. And circuitous as it seems, I think maybe the phallic overload serves as a way for Martians to assert their masculinity over others.
In all honesty, though, I can’t say I’ve had any first-hand experience with the drawn phallus, and I don’t quite understand the rationale behind it. I’m no psychoanalyst and I could well be wrong. It’s just a theory, but it seems like a relatively plausible explanation.
So this week, I’d like to pose a question for the boys: why exactly do you have such an affinity for your manhood?
